When we were children we were told, read, and watched stories. It’s part of the way we pass on our beliefs to our children. I don’t believe a lot of people realize the impact these stories have to a child’s subconscious mind. (During this post I will refer to children a great deal. If you aren’t a parent, it’s OK! The subject matter is still relevant. Look at how stories may have impacted your beliefs and values.)
One of the things I often do when I read to my son is to follow up with the story by asking him what kind of lesson did the main character learn? For example- After reading The Three Little Pigs I might ask him: Why do you think family is important? Is making something strong better than making it quickly? I often do this in the form of a discussion verses a question so he doesn’t feel like he’s being grilled.
Even if your parents didn’t follow up like this, chances are, your mind made its own summation of the story and its characters. The brain likes to catalog. We are overwhelmed with information from the moment we are born! As such, it assigns key ideas or emotions to a memory to enable recall. Even if you can’t remember all the details, you should be able to recall a feeling/an idea associated with the story. As children our subconscious mind absorbed two parts of a story. Firstly, it’s moral, or the message it laid down. Secondly, it takes in the archetype.
Men, Myths, Minds aptly put it as-
“Archetypes are inner images that embody a wealth of universal characteristics and experiences, universal to every culture and every time period. Archetypes are responsible for the persistent themes we see surfacing in our own lives.
Discovering your personal archetype can be an important first step on your journey to self-discovery and personal growth, It can help you use your inborn talents and abilities to help you grow in your work, health, spirit, as well as in your important relationships.”
There is a downside to Archetypes, and that is to assign ourselves a role and confine ourselves to it. In other words, you may be a Mother/Father, but that’s not ALL you are. The extreme to an Archetype is a Stereotype. THIS is what concerns me. To put someone in a Stereotype is always bad, especially when we do it to ourselves. As parents, we are particularly bad at doing this. It stems from our efforts to be the best parent we can. We want to embody the image of Mother/Father to our children. Even if you’re not a parent, you have probably still “classified” yourself.
Try this; Say the following statements out loud. Write down what word immediately pops in your mind in relation to the statement.
I AM…
I BELIEVE…
I’M ALWAYS…
What is the first word that came to mind with each? Explore this. Question yourself. Why do you associate these words with these statements? You can explore this further with other I statements.
So what now? How do we break out of these stereotypes? Knowledge is half the battle. Once you know what role you’ve assigned yourself- now you get to break out of it! That’s the fun part. Do something completely out of character that you’ve always wanted secretly to do. This can be at any end of the spectrum. Take that road you pass on your way home from work, just to find out where it goes. Tell someone how they’ve impacted your life for the better. It comes down to devoting time and effort to change. It is the conscious decision to address what’s important. Self Development is important! When the kids are grown, when you’re work life ends (retirement), when that project is over- what are you left with? You. Even outside of any relationship you might be in. Again, you are more than Husband/Wife, Girlfriend/Boyfriend, etc. Break out! Be more! You’ll have fun and you’ll love yourself for it!
Sow a thought, and you reap an act;
Sow an act, and you reap a habit;
Sow a habit, and you reap a character;
Sow a character, and you reap a destiny.
- Charles Reade

Thought this funny little comic suited!
Your Thoughts- Comments on Posts